


Musings of a Captain

by AXEe



Series: Musings [7]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Study, F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-29
Updated: 2018-08-29
Packaged: 2019-07-04 00:15:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15829839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AXEe/pseuds/AXEe
Summary: Kathryn Janeway muses on her decisions, both good and bad, and one very good decision...





	Musings of a Captain

**Author's Note:**

> We're back! More "Musings" up! Enjoy! :=)

******

Kathryn Janeway had made her fair share of bad decisions. Trapping _Voyager_ in the Delta Quadrant being at the top of proverbial list along with dozens of others, each made worse by subsequent attempts to fix them. But one decision she had never regretted, ever, was freeing Seven of Nine from the Borg.

From the moment she’d first seen Seven emerge from the alcove the other woman had fascinated her, there was something about her that had drawn Kathryn like the proverbial moth to the flame, even when Seven had vowed to kill her while pacing the brig, her skin still ashen grey, Borg exo-plating still clinging to her form, that fire, that stubbornness had enticed Kathryn, tempting her with something that she could never have.

No. Seven was innocent. Far too new to individuality to be dealing with Kathryn’s attraction, not mention her baggage. No, best to just ignore it. Let Seven find someone else to love.

Of course, it had never occurred to her that Seven might actually be attracted to her in return.

After all what could Seven see in her? She was at least thirty years Seven’s senior for one thing. Secondly she had far too much responsibility to devote time to a meaningful relationship (for Seven deserved nothing less), she would inevitably forget anniversaries and other special occasions and no doubt neglect to give Seven the attention she deserved, it would be unfair to Seven. No, it was best to remain alone until they got home.

But what had never occurred to Kathryn (possibly because she hadn’t wanted to see it) was that—while she’d been fretting and lecturing herself on Seven’s ‘innocence’—Seven had been quietly growing and developing all that time. Slowly but surely growing into a quiet, frighteningly intelligent, sweet, and compassionate young woman.

When a team of scientists from a planet that had been recently attacked by the Borg had been visiting _Voyager_ one of them had, upon meeting Seven, commented that it was ‘fortunate’ that the crew had ‘its own Borg drone to study’.

The comment hadn’t been meant as an insult, merely a misguided observation, but Seven’s reaction had surprised everyone, Kathryn most of all. The young woman had abruptly stood up, _slammed_ her hands down on the conference table and _growled_ out that she wasn’t a member of the Collective anymore.

Naturally, relations had swiftly taken a turn south after that, and the aliens had left _Voyager_ in a huff, and Seven had remained suspiciously absent for the rest of her shift.

But it wasn’t just that one incident, there were others, Kathryn still had a hard time believing Chakotay when he’d told her that he’d seen Seven actually _joining_ Tom and Harry on the holodeck playing _Captain Proton_. Then there was the time Seven had actually stolen the _Delta Flyer_ to deliver medical supplies to a planet that was recovering from a Borg attack.

Not to mention the time she’d been seen _juggling_ with Tom and Harry in the mess hall (and winning, obviously). Rumor also had it that she’d been engaged in a long-standing prank war with B’Elanna (which would explain the time that B’Elanna’s hair was bright pink).

But Kathryn hadn’t quite seen the relevance of all of these incidents, still deluding herself into thinking that Seven was far too innocent to even be contemplating the idea of a serious relationship, not after the time she spied on B’Elanna and Tom (Lt. Chapman _still_ avoided her like the plague apparently), no Kathyrn had been rather thick about that.

Until she found Seven in her quarters one night.

Having Seven show up in the middle of the night wasn’t all that unusual, but Seven usually rang the chime, she wasn’t usually already _inside_ when Kathryn walked in. 

For a moment Kathryn had stood in the doorway, frozen, as she took in the image before her. Seven was sitting—lounging, really—on the sofa, her hair down from its customarily bun, she’d also changed out of her biosuit replacing it with a loose, button-down white blouse and what looked like a pair of blue jeans and …sneakers?

Upon Kathryn entering, Seven had turned from looking out the viewport, smiling softly at Kathryn

“Hello” she’d greeted softly

“Seven,” Kathryn had acknowledged for lack of anything better to say “what are you doing?” seemed to be the next logical thing to say at the time.

In response, Seven had stood up, slowly approaching

“I wanted to discuss something with you” she had said

“I see,” Kathryn had nodded “by breaking into my quarters?”

Seven had distinctly _smirked_ at that as she stepped into Kathryn’s personal space

“This not the type of discussion that you would wish to become public knowledge” she’d explained

“I see” Kathryn had found herself backing away from the former drone, only to be stopped as her back had collided with the wall behind her. Seven’s sudden closeness had been hell on her self-control, the urge to bury her hands in that long blonde hair had been nearly irresistible, but she’d managed to resist as Seven spoke again

“I’ve come to…a revelation regarding my humanity” she’d explained

“Oh?” Kathryn had asked, shivering at Seven’s proximity

“Yes,” Seven had nodded, her eyes surprisingly bright “I’ve realized who I am,” she’d explained as she’d reach up to tenderly, hesitantly, stroke Kathryn’s cheek “I’m no longer the ‘Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix 01’,” she’d explained “but…,” she added “nor I am ‘Annika Hansen’ anymore”

That had surprised Kathryn

“Oh?” she’d asked “so…who you are now?” she’d wondered

Seven had smiled then, brilliantly, radiantly as she suddenly leaned in and gently, tentatively, placed her lips against Kathryn’s in a soft, gentle, slightly awkward kiss, before pulling away

“ _I am just…’Seven of Nine’_ ” she’d whispered…

Everything had changed at that moment; all the reasons as to why she _shouldn’t_ do this—her age, the responsibility to getting her ship and crew home safely—had evaporated in the face of all the possibilities before her.

Suddenly, the next several decades in the Delta Quadrant didn’t look so lonely, not with Seven at her side, and she realized even as she’d tried--and failed--to dissuade Seven that she _could_ do both, that she _could_ be a captain and a lover without having to sacrifice anything, Seven wouldn’t ask her to do that, the one advantage she’d gained from her time with the Borg—possibly the only one—was a lack of vanity.

But even then, Kathryn still couldn’t entirely silence those doubts. Fear about how the crew would react to their captain dating one of their own, not to mention the former Borg drone had driven her to swear Seven to keep their relationship a secret. In hindsight, she congratulated herself on being able of keeping such a secret for almost a full year.

But when Seven had finally convinced her to tell the crew, she’d been surprised at their reactions; namely nothing, most of the crew—minus possibly Harry—treated the matter with a mild indifference, Chakotay most of all, who had merely smiled and congratulated them.

Yes, she’d made her share of bad decisions, but freeing Seven wasn’t one of them…

******

“Captain?” 

Kathryn blinked and looked up from the PADD she’d been staring at for the last few minutes across the table at Chakotay, both her weekly dinner with him and the report in her hand forgotten

“Sorry, Chakotay” she apologized, shaking herself back to the present

“Something on your mind?” Chakotay asked “I know reviewing departmental reports isn’t exactly the most exciting thong but you seem awfully bothered”

Sighing, Kathryn set down the PADD and leaned forward across the table, absently pushing her now-cold plate away

“If I’d told you a year ago that I was dating Seven, what would your reaction have been?” she wondered

Chakotay frowned, clearly giving the question the serious thought it deserved

“I suppose,” he began “I’d have been OK with it”

“Really?” Kathryn asked, unable to hide the skepticism in her voice “you wouldn’t have objected?”

“No,” Chakotay shook his head “why would I? You’ve sacrificed so much for all of us, frankly I think its about time that universe gave you something in return for all that sacrifice” he explained

“So what?” she asked as the doors to her quarters opened “you’re saying that liberating Seven from the Borg was part of some…cosmic plan? That she’s my what...reward?”

Chakotay smirked as he glanced up at Seven as she came over, joining Kathryn on the sofa without a word, absently wrapping an arm around her shoulders as she did

“You tell me,” Chakotay chuckled as he finished his drink and stood up, nodding politely “well, I’ll leave you ladies alone. Good night, Kathryn, Seven”

“Chakotay” Seven nodded back politely as he quietly left the room. Now alone, Seven turned to Kathryn, confused “is everything all right?” she asked

Kathryn smiled and pulled Seven in for a gentle kiss

“Everything’s fine, darling” she whispered…

**END**

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you thought :=)


End file.
